silly goose

my nemesis lives in western springs. an avian
anger management failure. most aggrieved
in his undignified land waddle, like a toddler
in a marshmallow costume on the way 
to the buffet table 

of bread crumbs. I am feeding him baguette 
bits because they have no nutritional value
and also to escape

mr flappy rage machine. also known as mr 
hissing noodle and mr quack quack attack. 
oh hello. sorry if you were hurt by what I said. 

they were just silly names uttered in jest. it 
was not my intention to offend you. I’m sorry
your fattened liver makes such good 
organ butter. but look at what your kind 

did to prometheus. we all have some 
growing up to do. also what else am I 
going to fill my pillow with? there’s no

need to honk. I can honk louder than 
you. stop it. or else. I will cry. I will 
start a petition

to rename this pond to ‘no-goose lagoon’.
I will set up a toll booth on your favourite 
path. I will hire a mariachi band to follow you 
around all day. do not test me. I will destroy you


Zephyr Zhang 张挚 is actually fine with geese. Their poetry is published in places like Cordite, Landfall, Starling, Sweet Mammalian, and Rapture: An Anthology of Performance Poetry from Aotearoa New Zealand (Auckland University Press, 2023). Find more of Zephyr’s work at zephyrzhang.com.