Two Poems
#noragrets
flying high # i say put it in my obituary # say that
i sold my soul # but never to the devil # i killed
myself and i killed her # i killed my dreams and
they killed me # tell them i blew all the cash on #
wishes
spending time throwing up # throwing it down
a gauntlet # i challenged her to fight # and she said no
but i fought
yeah i fucking fought her anyway # i beat that bitch up
i say # put it on billboards # i ruined her
she gave me all she ever had # and i said # give me more #
wishes
tell them i bled for it # spat out teeth # for it, for it
i buried her in the ground # it set me free # soaring
ripping the wings from # underneath my skin # and saying
fly, you fucking idiot
fly, you fucking idiot
you live on an island # in your head so learn to swim # your heart is surrounded
by your ribs # crack your sternum # and set free all your #
wishes
i say i lived and died # for this shit, man, i did things
that i’m not proud of # i left them all behind # somewhere
i lost a lot of friends # somewhere # i said goodbye when
they put the gold # in my veins # and said
run, you fucking idiot
and i did what they said # i fucking gapped it # running on #
wishes
i wish #
to have the whole world #
between my thumb and pinky finger #
She (metaphorical)
she’s like that bitch of an ex / you never really
stopped loving except it was you that went no
contact / every summer / and came back every
winter / curled up sick on her couch and throwing
up in her kitchen sink. you know / that was probably
the greatest love of your life / and you know / it’s
all over now / fucking bloody dead and gone / is
what she said to her girlfriends / but then it was
fucking hot and burning / and wordless the way
silence suffocates everything it ever tries to love.
she’s like the time she said that / we’re in high school
what the hell we’re not getting married / except
you thought it was / for a long long time. maybe
not forever / but nobody ever has forever. when you
blanked her contact / that clingy bitch resorted to
whatsapp and linkedin / as in she’s not ever giving
you up / but she’d run away at the altar. fuck me
and biting her neck / bite your tongue when the
parents ask / so whatever happened to young love?
it just dribbled down the drain / out the nose / a
cerebral fluid of leaking brain matter / just like
all those nights spent dead starfished on the floor
wishing godforsaken she’d love you better. she
never / loved you quite the way you loved her.
Sascha Letica is an Auckland-based youth poet. Her work has previously been published by Poetry in Action, Massey University Press’s Poetry Aotearoa Yearbook Student Poetry Competition, and recently in the latest edition of Starling. When she’s not writing, she’s running (and thinking about writing).